Masturbation for men and religion are very uneasy bedfellows in a number of religions, but those that you thought might condemn it the most don’t, and some you thought might be more lenient get very worked up when the subject turns to five fingered Mary.

Roman Catholicism

Well, no surprises here, Roman Catholics are vehemently opposed to the concept of self abuse and view it as a venial sin, which is a forgiveable sin but keep confessing this one and your soul is going to linger in Purgatory a whole lot longer than Bernie Madoff is going to be in jail.

Episcopalian

As an Episcopalian there is no right or wrong indicated for masturbation for men, which normally means that they have not cogitated (a fancy word for thinking, not monkey spanking) over the issue. So this means as an Episcopalian it’s really do as you feel.

Jewish

Not encouraged or condoned, but by the same token, beating the meat won’t send you on a one way ticket to Valhalla either.

Muslim

Like Roman Catholicism, Islam is a complete lifestyle religion with a position on every facet of life, and yet surprisingly the Muslim stand on waxing the dolphin is relaxed. They belief pragmatically, that as there is no way to prohibit it, it should not be deemed a sin, but it is certainly not regarded as a desirable habit.

Mormon

Spilling the seed without the aim of procreation is  totally ‘permission denied.’ You get married, you procreate, you do not recreate by hand jiving with the one eyed trouser snake.

Baptist

Surprisingly, no position is taken either way in the Baptist faith, but best not to push your luck by asking your Baptist Minister after Sunday Service

Buddhist

Once again, Buddhists are fence sitters when it comes to the subject of punishing Percy.

Unitarianism

Unlike many religions, the Unitarian Church believes in helping people find their own spiritual path rather than defining it for them. The same applies to self pleasuring, do as you feel and feel as you like.